More Drama

Well I guess I have dug myself a deeper hole with Shannon- I have felt so bad that I fouled up on my dates- planning our trip to Alaska which is over lapping Shannon and Ryan’s anniversary trip to Cancun. They were married Sept 15th 1998 -27 years it’s hard to beleive the years have gone by all too fast. I tired calling our Granddaughters Saydee, Aubrey and Karlee to see if they would be available to help out. They are all busy working new jobs and going to school. So they were not an option- today I called Kathy Chaudhry - Ryan’s mother who lives in California- I know she has not been to Utah for several years. This would be a good time for her to have some bonding time with her grandkids, with Shannon out of the way. We had a very nice conversation and she is more than willing to help. She would love to have the opportunity. A sigh of relief for me that they do have another option. I don’t have to let Shannon throw her anger on me leaving them stranded without anyone to watch their kids on their up coming trip- I sent Ryan a text - Hi Ryan - I have felt ready bad about forgetting I said I would watch Ash with your upcoming trip - I have checked with all our older granddaughters and they are busy working - I did talk to your mother and she said she would love to come spend time with the kids and they are open to help ! So this does gives you an option - sorry I messed up and have caused any stress - it was for sure not intentional on my part - just a senior memory loss- love you all so very much and wish you a fabulous trip - Well all hell and furry has come down!! Shannon called screaming her head off in anger - luckily I didn’t here the phone ring but have a scathing voice message from her. I saw the voice text come through - and makes me laugh - where has my mother gone this summer? “I don't know what is wrong with you. I don't know where my mom went. I don't know the person who has known me my entire life. And that person is not present. How dare you? How dare you? Call Ryan's mom you have no right -You do not -you just don't even understand the level of anger and betrayal I have toward you right now. I want nothing from you. You have done enough, not only to my emotional well-being. My trust Is out of this world right now, mom I am done if you do not even understand the level You are just so completely unaware that why this whole thing is even an issue how dare you? How dare you? Give me a favor and stay out…” All I can say is she has made every issue that has come up this summer from a mole hill to a mountain by her attitude in over reacting !! have just tried to communicate with her and it has gone from bad to worse giving herself unneeded stress- I don’t want to talk to her in this state of mind yelling and screaming at me- I have crossed the line calling her mother in-law! Well she does have an option- she just chooses to be as mean as hell about it. I have not agreed with her, on how rude and disrespectful she has been to her mother in law. Shannon has not been nice to her in-laws-. She does have a choice for other family members to help out and I’m done letting her quilt me in shame. She is so mean with her words and attacking- she is missing in action when it comes to any family events. I have to walk on tIp Toes to get her there and then it is always two hours late. She doesn’t offer to ever help- I’m the one doing alll the work for her and serving her family. She is very short sighted in saying in her last voice text I don’t listen to her and help her with her problems - when I have been there and have listened to her for hours at a time over the years. She can talk and talk and I don’t get hardly any words in- I just listen to her and let her talk. I have confided to her my challenges over the years which now she is using against me - I have been a much more listening ear over the years. I have told her to be kind to her in-laws. She is not going to have it. She thinks it’s ok to yell and scream at me and it is ok for her to have her say about how she sees it! I was treated disrespectful by my mother doing the same thing to me and I will not allow myself to be abused by my own daughter with her terrible temper tantrums - I’m done being mistreated and a floor map to be walked on. I have said No and will continue to say no by her unkind behavior. My heart aches and I hate being cross threaded with any of my girls. Shannon is just going to need time and space to have a cooler head and realize I’m not her enemy, I have been in her court her entire life, I sacrificed giving birth and have truely strived to love and care for her in the 45 years of her entire life. I have been there when no one else has. She has forgotten the sacrifices I have made for her over the years. Her judgement is very clouded right now. Time will heal all hurts- I have not tired to hurt her- I just feel she is mentally not in a good place- she needs to let go of resentment toward her family members- even her in-laws -she has been terrible to them- shutting them out of their lives. Now she is pushing het own mother and sisters away. My heart aches for her but she has got to stop pushing the ones that love her the most away-she has a terrible temper and she thinks it’s ok to express her feelings and doesn’t look at others point of view in our family circle- she had been the one who left us this summer and pouting about things. She purposely did not attend the birthday party for her dad - which is very disappointing- attacking me and mad at me over the 4th of July- for me us allowing the Noriega family to spend time at our lake home while we were out town. She had the same opportunity to come as well and plan with her family some lake time and she gets all mad and upset and chooses to give me the cold shoulder I’m not returning any calls or texts messages- she has so much anger stored up -she has got to figure out how to let go and quit holding grudges- she is causing herself unneeded stress- I’m not going for always be here - she has got to communicate with her sisters in a nice way if she is going to have any time at our family lake home- she has failed the test terribly of how she will act when Craig and I have passed on. This summer she has been contentious, mean and purposely withdrawing herself from any association with her family. It is very sad! 😢